I am the cause of all that I experience
Most of us go through life blaming the external world of people, circumstances and events for the situation we find ourselves in. Rather than becoming victims, we need to respond in rational yet creative ways. Instead of reacting to the present or the past, we need to create the future. We need to realise the immense significance of the sentence “I am the cause of all that I experience.” There is no cause outside of me. The centre of gravity of my life lies within me. It is based on my personal response to the whole of life.
For instance if someone says “You are a hypocrite”, and my immediate response is to feel hurt and tell everyone around me that “she has hurt me”; I need to examine this reaction of mine. Is the statement “she has hurt me” a true statement? Or is the statement that “I have allowed her to hurt me” closer to the truth. When I say “She has hurt me” I am becoming a victim. I am blaming her for what I feel. I am relinquishing my responsibility. When I say “I have allowed her to hurt me” I am taking responsibility for my response to her statement. Besides this response, I can seriously introspect and see whether there is any truth in what she is saying or probe with her to see what she meant when she said this or ignore what she said because I do not give credence to what she says. I can examine all the possibilities and accordingly respond. In the manner in which I respond I will be creating the future. I will no longer be a victim of what was said.
Similarly we tend to blame our circumstances at work. Usually we tend to blame our bosses for giving us a rough time. I remember a particular boss of mine whose biological clock worked on a different time scale compared to that of his subordinates. He would, for most of the day be whiling away his time doing infructuous things. And then suddenly at 5 pm in the evening or thereabouts he would call us into his office and distribute work which he wanted ASAP. This would keep us working late into the night for most of the time. One couldn’t tell him upfront what one thought of this antic without facing dire consequences. So one did what one was told to do and delivered what was expected. And when one had gained enough of the trust and confidence of the boss, one told him about the inappropriateness of this behaviour. To give him credit he changed. The choice was either to submit oneself to his unreasonable kind of treatment and feel like a victim or take charge and consciously respond in a prudent manner. Suppose he hadn’t changed. And even after one tried other alternatives, he still didn’t change. Then one would need to consider leaving the organisation or finding some other position within the same organisation but reporting to a different boss. The point being made is not to become a victim but rather take responsibility for one’s response to one’s circumstances in a rational yet creative manner. Create the future instead of reacting to the present or the past.
Similarly if one finds oneself caught in a traffic jam one can fret and fume and blame all the possible things or people whom one feels responsible for creating this traffic jam at that point of time like the government not taking care to repair the potholes, or the number of cars on the road, or the digging of the roads which the government has undertaken to create new infrastructure, or the floods which have caused this jam or the movement of VIPs which has stalled traffic or an accident which has occurred and so on. Using the traffic jam as a catharsis for one’s frustration may seem good but still one is behaving like a victim. Rather one can calmly see how one can utilise this time in a more productive manner. Like reviewing what one needs to do in the office today or listening to some good podcasts, or music which one likes or reading some good blogs or articles which one has flagged and intended to read but hadn’t the time to do so and so on. The ubiquitous smart phone brings the world into the palm of one’s hand and offers innumerable choices. Or one could just remain silent and meditate. One is now responding to the situation in a rational yet creative manner and not becoming a victim of it. One is creating the future. One is not a victim of the present or the past.
I am the cause of all that I experience.
