More, Better, Different
Most of our lives revolve around just 3 words — More, Better, Different.
We chase after wanting something more than what we have. If we have 3 pairs of shoes we want 6 pairs of shoes. Or wanting something better. If we have a one bedroom house we want a 3-bedroom house. Or wanting something different. If we have a motorbike we want a car. And so the spiral goes on increasing endlessly in an ever upward path hoping to achieve fulfilment. It’s like a dog chasing its own tail or a person chasing his/her own shadow. It’s a frustratingly futile exercise. But we indulge in it because we firmly believe that by acquiring wealth and stuff we will be happy. We treat happiness as a goal. And the more we run after it the more elusive it gets.
We can never ever be satisfied and we will never know how much is enough. Because when we reach our imagined goal we feel cheated. Our reaction is “Is this all there is to it?” The thrill and fame experienced leaves us empty. We believe that there is definitely something more to achieve and obtain and so we go on and on. This is how so called progress is made and measured by the metric of GDP. But GDP ‘progress’ doesn’t equate to happiness.
There is a need within us to continuously measure life. But if we examine the etymology of the word ‘Maya’ meaning ‘illusion’ we realise that it, most probably, is derived from the Sanskrit primal root ‘Mā’ which means ‘to measure’. What we try to capture in measurement eludes us in reality. Quantitative measurement can never capture the qualitative reality of the whole. Reducing life to a business metric of GDP destroys life. We are now seeking different types of metrics like Gross National Happiness Index or the Genuine Progress Indicator and so on. They may be improvements on GDP but do they capture the true reality of happiness and well-being? How can one measure happiness which is immeasurable? Happiness needs to be experienced. Not intellectually analysed and understood.
One of the routes towards experiencing happiness comes from ‘Giving’. Giving without expecting anything in return. Giving till it hurts. Giving through random acts of kindness which give us a glimpse of what it truly means to be happy. Giving encompasses material and non-material giving. We, however, have got trapped in the gilded cage of ‘Getting’. And consequently protecting ourselves from ‘not losing’ what we have got.
A poor person doesn’t need to be told to share. He/she shares whatever little he/she has. When you have very little you know what the other person who has nothing is going through much better than anyone else and that is enough to prompt you to share. Riches take away our humanity. And fragment us into segments of competitive comparison. In this cataclysmic crisis of Covid 19 where all of us are struggling to survive we need to be responsible for one another’s well-being.
They say that a crisis confronts us with who we are. We realise our frailty. Our egos take a bashing. We realise our common humanity. We experience our pain. This is not just an emotional or psychological pain but a spiritual pain. Ultimately we are spiritual beings in search of our true home. However, we have disconnected ourselves from our deepest source of value and meaning. We are running adrift. We have now been given an opportunity through Covid-19 to course correct and find our true north.
If during this period we reflect on our lives and how we have lived, it is possible we will hear an inner voice say “You don’t need to live like this”. Being disillusioned reveals to us what does not have real meaning. We may need to seek a different path. Create a new life which is more fulfilling, more meaningful, and more congruent with one’s inner self.
